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Bullying boss launched a smear campaign and made me unemployable

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Bullying boss launched a smear campaign and made me unemployable


How to deal with bullying at work when it has become the company culture?dealing with bullyingDealing with boss and his request to (male) employees including myself, how to handle this right?How to avoid a project subtly to avoid interacting with former bossOffice violenceIs this a case of workplace bullying or I'm I just being paranoid?Colleague ignores my emails and accuses me of bullyingMy boss jokes too often about me not been able to write good code to the point I think it may damage my reputation. Any solution?Workplace condones bullying - resignation letters and future interviewsHow can I stop my boss in Germany from bullying me without worsening my future job prospects?













9















My boss has a history of bullying multiple people in the past to work crazy hours to meet absolutely unrealistic deadlines which have led to numerous cases of serious depression and even one (thankfully unsuccessful) attempt of suicide among his employees. I have heard a story of one person getting so depressed, it led to a divorce and him emigrating to another country.



He is known in the industry for developing a start-up company with his partners and selling it for a couple dozen million euros.



In public is a very soft spoken and friendly person. I would say he seems the friendliest person I have ever met, which causes cognitive dissonance in my brain. This is how a lot of other business owners, managers and generally people in the industry know him.



In Sweden, where I live it is a part of the culture to avoid confrontations at all cost, so to what I have seen so far, most people who had any guts to deal with the situation quietly quit.



I have done something stupid. I confronted him publicly and demanded a change. Lots of people supported me privately, but not a single one joined me in the public.



His reaction was cutting my benefits, creating obstructions to my work, not inviting me to meetings, ignoring me, taking away my projects and assigning made up meaningless tasks to me.



I have informed HR and after some behind closed doors talks I was offered either relocation to Germany (as I am German myself) or 6 months pay and resignation. Since I have a mortgage, wife and 2 preschool kids, I have chosen the former.



Now I am searching for a new job and facing a true job seeker's nightmare:



  • interviews being cancelled the last moment

  • people that tried to recruit me in the past do not even reply to my emails

  • yesterday's interviewers hanging out the phone

  • etc.

Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".



Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.



This guy destroyed my reputation and all the evidence of this.



Now I am having a panic attack and trying to calm myself with whiskey while my wife and kids watching a movie.



How can I prevent my former boss from sabotaging future job opportunities?



TL;DR I have bullying manager who is very well-connected in the industry and is destroying my reputation.










share|improve this question









New contributor




Tobias is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.















  • 1





    Have you considered going into a different industry?

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago






  • 4





    If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

    – tweray
    2 hours ago












  • Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago






  • 1





    "I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago











  • @tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago















9















My boss has a history of bullying multiple people in the past to work crazy hours to meet absolutely unrealistic deadlines which have led to numerous cases of serious depression and even one (thankfully unsuccessful) attempt of suicide among his employees. I have heard a story of one person getting so depressed, it led to a divorce and him emigrating to another country.



He is known in the industry for developing a start-up company with his partners and selling it for a couple dozen million euros.



In public is a very soft spoken and friendly person. I would say he seems the friendliest person I have ever met, which causes cognitive dissonance in my brain. This is how a lot of other business owners, managers and generally people in the industry know him.



In Sweden, where I live it is a part of the culture to avoid confrontations at all cost, so to what I have seen so far, most people who had any guts to deal with the situation quietly quit.



I have done something stupid. I confronted him publicly and demanded a change. Lots of people supported me privately, but not a single one joined me in the public.



His reaction was cutting my benefits, creating obstructions to my work, not inviting me to meetings, ignoring me, taking away my projects and assigning made up meaningless tasks to me.



I have informed HR and after some behind closed doors talks I was offered either relocation to Germany (as I am German myself) or 6 months pay and resignation. Since I have a mortgage, wife and 2 preschool kids, I have chosen the former.



Now I am searching for a new job and facing a true job seeker's nightmare:



  • interviews being cancelled the last moment

  • people that tried to recruit me in the past do not even reply to my emails

  • yesterday's interviewers hanging out the phone

  • etc.

Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".



Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.



This guy destroyed my reputation and all the evidence of this.



Now I am having a panic attack and trying to calm myself with whiskey while my wife and kids watching a movie.



How can I prevent my former boss from sabotaging future job opportunities?



TL;DR I have bullying manager who is very well-connected in the industry and is destroying my reputation.










share|improve this question









New contributor




Tobias is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.















  • 1





    Have you considered going into a different industry?

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago






  • 4





    If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

    – tweray
    2 hours ago












  • Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago






  • 1





    "I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago











  • @tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago













9












9








9








My boss has a history of bullying multiple people in the past to work crazy hours to meet absolutely unrealistic deadlines which have led to numerous cases of serious depression and even one (thankfully unsuccessful) attempt of suicide among his employees. I have heard a story of one person getting so depressed, it led to a divorce and him emigrating to another country.



He is known in the industry for developing a start-up company with his partners and selling it for a couple dozen million euros.



In public is a very soft spoken and friendly person. I would say he seems the friendliest person I have ever met, which causes cognitive dissonance in my brain. This is how a lot of other business owners, managers and generally people in the industry know him.



In Sweden, where I live it is a part of the culture to avoid confrontations at all cost, so to what I have seen so far, most people who had any guts to deal with the situation quietly quit.



I have done something stupid. I confronted him publicly and demanded a change. Lots of people supported me privately, but not a single one joined me in the public.



His reaction was cutting my benefits, creating obstructions to my work, not inviting me to meetings, ignoring me, taking away my projects and assigning made up meaningless tasks to me.



I have informed HR and after some behind closed doors talks I was offered either relocation to Germany (as I am German myself) or 6 months pay and resignation. Since I have a mortgage, wife and 2 preschool kids, I have chosen the former.



Now I am searching for a new job and facing a true job seeker's nightmare:



  • interviews being cancelled the last moment

  • people that tried to recruit me in the past do not even reply to my emails

  • yesterday's interviewers hanging out the phone

  • etc.

Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".



Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.



This guy destroyed my reputation and all the evidence of this.



Now I am having a panic attack and trying to calm myself with whiskey while my wife and kids watching a movie.



How can I prevent my former boss from sabotaging future job opportunities?



TL;DR I have bullying manager who is very well-connected in the industry and is destroying my reputation.










share|improve this question









New contributor




Tobias is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.












My boss has a history of bullying multiple people in the past to work crazy hours to meet absolutely unrealistic deadlines which have led to numerous cases of serious depression and even one (thankfully unsuccessful) attempt of suicide among his employees. I have heard a story of one person getting so depressed, it led to a divorce and him emigrating to another country.



He is known in the industry for developing a start-up company with his partners and selling it for a couple dozen million euros.



In public is a very soft spoken and friendly person. I would say he seems the friendliest person I have ever met, which causes cognitive dissonance in my brain. This is how a lot of other business owners, managers and generally people in the industry know him.



In Sweden, where I live it is a part of the culture to avoid confrontations at all cost, so to what I have seen so far, most people who had any guts to deal with the situation quietly quit.



I have done something stupid. I confronted him publicly and demanded a change. Lots of people supported me privately, but not a single one joined me in the public.



His reaction was cutting my benefits, creating obstructions to my work, not inviting me to meetings, ignoring me, taking away my projects and assigning made up meaningless tasks to me.



I have informed HR and after some behind closed doors talks I was offered either relocation to Germany (as I am German myself) or 6 months pay and resignation. Since I have a mortgage, wife and 2 preschool kids, I have chosen the former.



Now I am searching for a new job and facing a true job seeker's nightmare:



  • interviews being cancelled the last moment

  • people that tried to recruit me in the past do not even reply to my emails

  • yesterday's interviewers hanging out the phone

  • etc.

Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".



Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.



This guy destroyed my reputation and all the evidence of this.



Now I am having a panic attack and trying to calm myself with whiskey while my wife and kids watching a movie.



How can I prevent my former boss from sabotaging future job opportunities?



TL;DR I have bullying manager who is very well-connected in the industry and is destroying my reputation.







bullying reputation sweden






share|improve this question









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share|improve this question









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share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited 1 hour ago









BSMP

3,5281327




3,5281327






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asked 2 hours ago









TobiasTobias

573




573




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Check out our Code of Conduct.






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Check out our Code of Conduct.







  • 1





    Have you considered going into a different industry?

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago






  • 4





    If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

    – tweray
    2 hours ago












  • Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago






  • 1





    "I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago











  • @tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago












  • 1





    Have you considered going into a different industry?

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago






  • 4





    If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

    – tweray
    2 hours ago












  • Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago






  • 1





    "I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

    – Joe Strazzere
    2 hours ago











  • @tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago







1




1





Have you considered going into a different industry?

– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago





Have you considered going into a different industry?

– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago




4




4





If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

– tweray
2 hours ago






If what you described is true, what your former boss did is way past freedom of speech and quite a few steps into defamation and personal harassment zone, talk to a lawyer with expertise in subject matter. Also if your former boss is a public figure, you may also want to contact local press.

– tweray
2 hours ago














Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

– Tobias
2 hours ago





Yes, I have to investigate my options here. The problem is re-education will take time and the town is not big. People here trust those who have reputation like my boss.

– Tobias
2 hours ago




1




1





"I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago





"I am not exactly sure what my question is" - you might want to think this over a bit and be more clear what you are asking for. You are unlikely to get a good answer without a real question.

– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago













@tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

– Tobias
2 hours ago





@tweray we've agreed with the lawyer I talked to today that I will collect evidence of our interactions and get back to her, so she can evaluate whether that information can be used anyhow, but even the freaking calendar invitation from HR for a meeting to discuss the situation is gone. I feel like I am dreaming now.

– Tobias
2 hours ago










3 Answers
3






active

oldest

votes


















15














I would suggest being forward on fist interview / CV stage and state that XXX have a personal grudge against you and you don`t want to get in to the details due to being non-confrontational person etc.



State that your previous in-company move was due to him hounding you.



This way you would move whatever he says about your from professional to personal grudge level.



I am not very surprised about paper trail being missing, when dealing with such a snake, any evidence anyone may have against him, he would do all in his power to destroy
And when it is his word against yours it comes down to your metaphorical weight in the category you clash.






share|improve this answer























  • Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago











  • @Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

    – Strader
    2 hours ago



















9














I think the real problem here is that your boss knows you are looking for employment elsewhere, and also seems to know with whom and when you are interviewing for jobs. How is he getting this information? If you can block his access to this information, he can't run interference on your job hunting.



If the industry is so small that this is not feasible, you may need to consider leaving the industry for another line of work. Some wells cannot be unpoisoned, sadly.






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New contributor




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  • My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

    – Tobias
    1 hour ago











  • Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

    – J. Chris Compton
    39 mins ago











  • There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

    – dbeer
    5 mins ago


















5














A few thoughts:




Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".




You should definitely attempt to get this company to hear your side of the story. Assuming you have worked at other companies, your side of the story will be much more compelling with recommendations from other companies you have worked for. Additionally, you should find other people that have quit this company and would be willing to privately vouch for you. This will also bolster your side of things and could be useful for any legal action you might take.




Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.




You should write down everything that happened in detail. Things like:



  • The date you filed a complaint with HR

  • The details of your confrontation, including the motivation for it.

I'm shocked to hear that they say he's exercising his freedom of speech. It seems to go well beyond that, even though the part about winning a settlement being difficult is probably true. However, you can probably get him to stop by getting an attorney to send him a letter threatening legal action if he doesn't stop defaming you (this is usually the first step to a legal battle anyway).



My last suggestion is to reach out to people who you already know in the industry for help. People you know personally shouldn't be scared off by this guy emailing them.






share|improve this answer


















  • 1





    posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

    – Tobias
    59 mins ago











  • That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

    – dbeer
    15 mins ago











  • The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

    – Kevin
    13 secs ago











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3 Answers
3






active

oldest

votes








3 Answers
3






active

oldest

votes









active

oldest

votes






active

oldest

votes









15














I would suggest being forward on fist interview / CV stage and state that XXX have a personal grudge against you and you don`t want to get in to the details due to being non-confrontational person etc.



State that your previous in-company move was due to him hounding you.



This way you would move whatever he says about your from professional to personal grudge level.



I am not very surprised about paper trail being missing, when dealing with such a snake, any evidence anyone may have against him, he would do all in his power to destroy
And when it is his word against yours it comes down to your metaphorical weight in the category you clash.






share|improve this answer























  • Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago











  • @Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

    – Strader
    2 hours ago
















15














I would suggest being forward on fist interview / CV stage and state that XXX have a personal grudge against you and you don`t want to get in to the details due to being non-confrontational person etc.



State that your previous in-company move was due to him hounding you.



This way you would move whatever he says about your from professional to personal grudge level.



I am not very surprised about paper trail being missing, when dealing with such a snake, any evidence anyone may have against him, he would do all in his power to destroy
And when it is his word against yours it comes down to your metaphorical weight in the category you clash.






share|improve this answer























  • Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago











  • @Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

    – Strader
    2 hours ago














15












15








15







I would suggest being forward on fist interview / CV stage and state that XXX have a personal grudge against you and you don`t want to get in to the details due to being non-confrontational person etc.



State that your previous in-company move was due to him hounding you.



This way you would move whatever he says about your from professional to personal grudge level.



I am not very surprised about paper trail being missing, when dealing with such a snake, any evidence anyone may have against him, he would do all in his power to destroy
And when it is his word against yours it comes down to your metaphorical weight in the category you clash.






share|improve this answer













I would suggest being forward on fist interview / CV stage and state that XXX have a personal grudge against you and you don`t want to get in to the details due to being non-confrontational person etc.



State that your previous in-company move was due to him hounding you.



This way you would move whatever he says about your from professional to personal grudge level.



I am not very surprised about paper trail being missing, when dealing with such a snake, any evidence anyone may have against him, he would do all in his power to destroy
And when it is his word against yours it comes down to your metaphorical weight in the category you clash.







share|improve this answer












share|improve this answer



share|improve this answer










answered 2 hours ago









StraderStrader

3,945630




3,945630












  • Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago











  • @Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

    – Strader
    2 hours ago


















  • Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

    – Tobias
    2 hours ago











  • @Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

    – Strader
    2 hours ago

















Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

– Tobias
2 hours ago





Thank you for the comment. I might try this. The issue is it will be hard from now on to even get an interview.

– Tobias
2 hours ago













@Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

– Strader
2 hours ago






@Tobias it would take some time to circulate your relation, but you should start spreading it around in order to move any comments he will have about you to personal level from professional, it would help to have someone on his / higher level to speak well on your behalf. Otherwise you would need to move to your own company or switch industry to something completely non-related

– Strader
2 hours ago














9














I think the real problem here is that your boss knows you are looking for employment elsewhere, and also seems to know with whom and when you are interviewing for jobs. How is he getting this information? If you can block his access to this information, he can't run interference on your job hunting.



If the industry is so small that this is not feasible, you may need to consider leaving the industry for another line of work. Some wells cannot be unpoisoned, sadly.






share|improve this answer








New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.




















  • My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

    – Tobias
    1 hour ago











  • Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

    – J. Chris Compton
    39 mins ago











  • There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

    – dbeer
    5 mins ago















9














I think the real problem here is that your boss knows you are looking for employment elsewhere, and also seems to know with whom and when you are interviewing for jobs. How is he getting this information? If you can block his access to this information, he can't run interference on your job hunting.



If the industry is so small that this is not feasible, you may need to consider leaving the industry for another line of work. Some wells cannot be unpoisoned, sadly.






share|improve this answer








New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.




















  • My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

    – Tobias
    1 hour ago











  • Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

    – J. Chris Compton
    39 mins ago











  • There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

    – dbeer
    5 mins ago













9












9








9







I think the real problem here is that your boss knows you are looking for employment elsewhere, and also seems to know with whom and when you are interviewing for jobs. How is he getting this information? If you can block his access to this information, he can't run interference on your job hunting.



If the industry is so small that this is not feasible, you may need to consider leaving the industry for another line of work. Some wells cannot be unpoisoned, sadly.






share|improve this answer








New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.










I think the real problem here is that your boss knows you are looking for employment elsewhere, and also seems to know with whom and when you are interviewing for jobs. How is he getting this information? If you can block his access to this information, he can't run interference on your job hunting.



If the industry is so small that this is not feasible, you may need to consider leaving the industry for another line of work. Some wells cannot be unpoisoned, sadly.







share|improve this answer








New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









share|improve this answer



share|improve this answer






New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









answered 1 hour ago









guest12345guest12345

911




911




New contributor




guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.





New contributor





guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.






guest12345 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.












  • My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

    – Tobias
    1 hour ago











  • Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

    – J. Chris Compton
    39 mins ago











  • There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

    – dbeer
    5 mins ago

















  • My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

    – Tobias
    1 hour ago











  • Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

    – J. Chris Compton
    39 mins ago











  • There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

    – dbeer
    5 mins ago
















My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

– Tobias
1 hour ago





My personal email and phone are secure, so it's unlikely he is getting information from anywhere. It seems he simply "spread the rumor" of "toxic" person looking for a new job in the industry.

– Tobias
1 hour ago













Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

– J. Chris Compton
39 mins ago





Or your boss is well connected and those people are reaching out to him to see if he knows anything about you. Any way to leave that company off your resume/CV?

– J. Chris Compton
39 mins ago













There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

– dbeer
5 mins ago





There are lots of companies that reach out to your previous employers; this isn't likely something that can stay completely a secret.

– dbeer
5 mins ago











5














A few thoughts:




Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".




You should definitely attempt to get this company to hear your side of the story. Assuming you have worked at other companies, your side of the story will be much more compelling with recommendations from other companies you have worked for. Additionally, you should find other people that have quit this company and would be willing to privately vouch for you. This will also bolster your side of things and could be useful for any legal action you might take.




Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.




You should write down everything that happened in detail. Things like:



  • The date you filed a complaint with HR

  • The details of your confrontation, including the motivation for it.

I'm shocked to hear that they say he's exercising his freedom of speech. It seems to go well beyond that, even though the part about winning a settlement being difficult is probably true. However, you can probably get him to stop by getting an attorney to send him a letter threatening legal action if he doesn't stop defaming you (this is usually the first step to a legal battle anyway).



My last suggestion is to reach out to people who you already know in the industry for help. People you know personally shouldn't be scared off by this guy emailing them.






share|improve this answer


















  • 1





    posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

    – Tobias
    59 mins ago











  • That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

    – dbeer
    15 mins ago











  • The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

    – Kevin
    13 secs ago















5














A few thoughts:




Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".




You should definitely attempt to get this company to hear your side of the story. Assuming you have worked at other companies, your side of the story will be much more compelling with recommendations from other companies you have worked for. Additionally, you should find other people that have quit this company and would be willing to privately vouch for you. This will also bolster your side of things and could be useful for any legal action you might take.




Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.




You should write down everything that happened in detail. Things like:



  • The date you filed a complaint with HR

  • The details of your confrontation, including the motivation for it.

I'm shocked to hear that they say he's exercising his freedom of speech. It seems to go well beyond that, even though the part about winning a settlement being difficult is probably true. However, you can probably get him to stop by getting an attorney to send him a letter threatening legal action if he doesn't stop defaming you (this is usually the first step to a legal battle anyway).



My last suggestion is to reach out to people who you already know in the industry for help. People you know personally shouldn't be scared off by this guy emailing them.






share|improve this answer


















  • 1





    posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

    – Tobias
    59 mins ago











  • That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

    – dbeer
    15 mins ago











  • The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

    – Kevin
    13 secs ago













5












5








5







A few thoughts:




Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".




You should definitely attempt to get this company to hear your side of the story. Assuming you have worked at other companies, your side of the story will be much more compelling with recommendations from other companies you have worked for. Additionally, you should find other people that have quit this company and would be willing to privately vouch for you. This will also bolster your side of things and could be useful for any legal action you might take.




Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.




You should write down everything that happened in detail. Things like:



  • The date you filed a complaint with HR

  • The details of your confrontation, including the motivation for it.

I'm shocked to hear that they say he's exercising his freedom of speech. It seems to go well beyond that, even though the part about winning a settlement being difficult is probably true. However, you can probably get him to stop by getting an attorney to send him a letter threatening legal action if he doesn't stop defaming you (this is usually the first step to a legal battle anyway).



My last suggestion is to reach out to people who you already know in the industry for help. People you know personally shouldn't be scared off by this guy emailing them.






share|improve this answer













A few thoughts:




Last Friday a friend of mind from the company I have had an absolutely fantastic interview last week, after which I received super short rejection email, told me everyone approved me, but last week they received an email from my current boss telling them not to hire me, because "I am conflicting" and "will certainly cause problems".




You should definitely attempt to get this company to hear your side of the story. Assuming you have worked at other companies, your side of the story will be much more compelling with recommendations from other companies you have worked for. Additionally, you should find other people that have quit this company and would be willing to privately vouch for you. This will also bolster your side of things and could be useful for any legal action you might take.




Today, I had a quick chat with a union representative and a lawyer. Both told me that technically he is just exercising his freedom of speech and it'll be hard to run a legal action against him, but I should collect all the evidence and proofs of all the interactions between him and me, so I went back to office after work hours and found out that my inbox is missing lots of emails sent to him and HR.




You should write down everything that happened in detail. Things like:



  • The date you filed a complaint with HR

  • The details of your confrontation, including the motivation for it.

I'm shocked to hear that they say he's exercising his freedom of speech. It seems to go well beyond that, even though the part about winning a settlement being difficult is probably true. However, you can probably get him to stop by getting an attorney to send him a letter threatening legal action if he doesn't stop defaming you (this is usually the first step to a legal battle anyway).



My last suggestion is to reach out to people who you already know in the industry for help. People you know personally shouldn't be scared off by this guy emailing them.







share|improve this answer












share|improve this answer



share|improve this answer










answered 1 hour ago









dbeerdbeer

8,11961627




8,11961627







  • 1





    posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

    – Tobias
    59 mins ago











  • That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

    – dbeer
    15 mins ago











  • The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

    – Kevin
    13 secs ago












  • 1





    posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

    – Tobias
    59 mins ago











  • That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

    – dbeer
    15 mins ago











  • The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

    – Kevin
    13 secs ago







1




1





posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

– Tobias
59 mins ago





posted this story on one Swedish forum and was told a story: (shortened, free translation): ex-colleague of mine sued my previous employer for bullying her after discovering her ethnicity and now her name is in the public registry of court cases, so every time someone googles her name, they find out about the incident and know she has sued her previous employer. She changed name and is currently in the uni obtaining degree in a different field. I'm not 11 and understand that life is not fair, but what the actual f@#$?

– Tobias
59 mins ago













That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

– dbeer
15 mins ago





That's pretty insane; has she faced repercussions?

– dbeer
15 mins ago













The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

– Kevin
13 secs ago





The sad problem is... no, the interviewing company's probably not going to care about 'your' side. Reason? The company isn't out to uncover the truth, they're out to hire someone good for their team. Why bother taking the risk on the OP and misjudging who's to blame? Just find a similar applicant that doesn't have the possibility of such a huge issue hanging over them. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying this is right, and I definitely feel for the OP... but I don't think it's as simple as "giving your side" to a potential employer.

– Kevin
13 secs ago










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